Straight to the Heart

Every parent wants to see their child shine. We feel immense pride when our children walk across the stage to collect an award or hear their names announced for an achievement. And that pride is deserved — hard work and excellence should always be celebrated.

But as I look around classrooms and playgrounds, I sometimes wonder whether we, as parents and educators, have started to lose sight of what truly matters. Have we placed so much emphasis on awards and recognition that we’ve forgotten the quiet, far more powerful lessons that reach straight to the heart — the lessons of character?

We live in a world that constantly measures, compares, and ranks. Children are graded, assessed, and evaluated from the moment they enter school. And while achievement is important, it should never come at the cost of compassion.

An award can open a door, but character determines how a person walks through it. A child with kindness, integrity, and empathy will build relationships that last a lifetime. A child who is humble in success and gracious in defeat will never lose their sense of self.

At The Turning Point, we’ve seen it time and again; the children who thrive are not always those who come first, but those who know how to lift others, who show respect, and who find happiness in both giving and growing.

If we teach children that being the best is what matters most, we set them up for a lifetime of comparison. But when we teach them that being good is what matters most, we set them up for a lifetime of peace.

Character isn’t built in a single lesson; it’s shaped over time, through moments, words, and examples. And while schools play a role, parents are the first and most powerful teachers a child will ever have.

Children are always watching. They listen to how we speak about others, how we handle disappointment, how we respond to the success of our own and someone else’s.

When we show kindness, they learn kindness.
When we respond with patience, they learn self-control.
When we speak with humility, they learn respect.

But the opposite is also true. When we criticise others’ achievements or downplay another child’s success, our children learn to compete without compassion. They learn to equate worth with winning.

It’s not easy, I know that as a parent myself. Watching your child feel left out or overlooked can tug at your heart. But those are the golden moments for growth. When we comfort our children and remind them that their value isn’t determined by a medal, we are shaping something far more precious than a moment of success. We’re shaping resilience.

One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is the ability to be happy for someone else.

In today’s culture of comparison, where social media constantly showcases other people’s achievements, this is not an easy lesson to teach. But it’s an essential one.

Children who learn to celebrate others’ success grow into adults who are confident, secure, and kind. They don’t see life as a competition, but as a shared journey where everyone wins when someone succeeds.

We can model this in everyday moments.
When a friend’s child receives an award, congratulate them wholeheartedly.
When your own child’s friend performs well, encourage your child to say, “Well done!”
When siblings achieve different things, teach them to be each other’s cheerleaders.

This simple practice builds empathy and gratitude, two qualities the world desperately needs more of.

Kindness doesn’t come with certificates or applause. It’s not measured in marks or mentioned on report cards. But it changes lives,  sometimes in ways we may never see.

A child who is kind to a classmate who feels left out, who helps someone up after a fall, or who speaks up when someone is treated unfairly — that child is demonstrating leadership in its truest form.

Kindness is strength wrapped in gentleness. It’s courage in action.

And the most powerful way to teach it? Through example. When children see their parents greet others warmly, speak respectfully to staff, and show empathy toward those in need, they learn that kindness isn’t a performance, it’s a way of being.

At The Turning Point, we often remind families that academic excellence and emotional intelligence are not opposites. In fact, they thrive together. A child who feels safe, seen, and valued will naturally do their best not to please others, but because they take pride in who they are.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage one’s emotions and relate well to others, is one of the strongest predictors of success in life.

Children who can recognise how they feel, talk about it, and manage it calmly are better equipped to handle stress, conflict, and disappointment. They are also more empathetic toward others.

Parents can nurture emotional intelligence in simple but powerful ways:

• Name emotions: “You look disappointed. That must feel hard.”
• Validate feelings: “It’s okay to feel sad. I understand.”
• Encourage empathy: “How do you think your friend felt when that happened?”

These conversations teach children that feelings are not weaknesses to hide, but signals to understand. When we listen to our children with patience, they learn to listen to others with compassion.

Because long after the awards have faded, the kind of person your child becomes will speak louder than any medal ever could.

When we teach children that success is not about being better than others but about being better for others, we give them a gift that lasts a lifetime.

In the end, the world doesn’t need more award winners.
It needs more people who care deeply, live honestly, and love generously.

That’s what goes straight to the heart.